Growing Up.

As we all get older we all become more responsible and we have to start taking the consequences for our actions. And all of us have to eventually have to make huge decisions that will not only impact our lives but the ones around us.

But for me growing up just plain sucks. This is mostly because as we grow up things start to change and we all have to come to accept that. Like people that left a great impression on us start dying off. 1 month ago I was Balling my eyes out because my Great Grandmother had died and she was one of my heros. But when I was crying I told my mom that when I grow up I want to die young, and she asked why? So then I told her that I don't wanna live so long that everyone that matters to me eventually dies because I really don't think I will be able to handle that pain. Then she told me that, that would be pretty selfish of you. Because when people die it doesn't leave that big of a mark on the person that dies but it leaves a huge dent on the people that cared alot about that person. Ether way though I really don't think that I'll be able to handle that pain too many times. But in the real truth its the fact that I know that I wont be able to see/touch/listen/and even talk to those people that die that affects me the most.

Not that many people know that much about me but as we get older things start to change, we stop talking as much, we stop hanging out as much as we use to, and eventually we get farther and farther away from each other then all I'm left with is the memories of the good times we had
:-(....... But its those memories that keep me going because I know that those good times happened in the past and chances are that they leave time so that they can happen again. No matter how many times I would like to repeat the past I probably wouldn't want to change any of the decisions that I have made because each one is a learning experience, and chances are that if I didn't make those decisions that I wouldn't be where I am today and you probably wouldn't be where you are ether. I'm always thinking about my friends and family every second and I always think of how my choices will affect them in the long run.

But no matter how many choices I make, I really do believe that things will turn out for the best.